May

So I know I am jumping the gun because April is not over, but YAY another month down. We have 15 weeks left until we get to see Toby again and I am so excited!!

May is going to be a biggie for me. Personally I am going crazy on how good it feels to reach your goals and set higher standards for myself.

I ran 2 miles in 19 minutes today!! I might have blown out my knee but it was all I could do to not fall off the treadmill and have the making of my "most embarrasing moment". I also have to say that I am getting some pretty awesome arms and shoulders. Still have to work on those abs, but not quite willing to give up my soda completly.

I have made it into Mosiah in the Book of Mormon, which is awesome considering as a family we are still in 2nd Nephi where I feel completly confused. I am excited also that we have been studying the Preach my Gospel manual and as a family are excited about sharing the gospel

I did get two digital scrapbook things done, but not put to music yet, like I would like them. In May would like to finish two more years, and also make two more DVDs to send to Toby to make sure he knows we have not forgotten him and love him tremendously.

Mary Kay however was a different story. I did hold some appts, but not at the level I desire. I was too busy helping others out, so I am excited about refocusing on that goal.

I have a physical on the 7th of May and am pretty optimistic. They are going to do some blood work, and hopefully tell me how I am doing physically to keep up my workout pace. I am still getting sick and am actually getting very weak some days, but the Lord bolsters me up and makes me capable to reach higher and work harder.

I am loving my calling as Primary Chorister (mind you they changed the primary presidency on sunday). It is very exciting and helps me remember how much music really can change how you feel and act.

May is going to be busy getting the kids done with school,gymnastics,and football but I HAVE to reach my goals this month without hesitation.

I know the Lord wants me to succeed and with his help I will not fail. I love the gospel of Jesus Christ and his teachings. I am grateful for the safety that has been provided for me and recognize God and his blessings to me in my life.

GO MAY!!

P.S. I decided to do the Mrs. Texas pageant for real and am going to find a sponsor this week..US ARMY maybe? I am putting my packet in and getting another awesome picture taken at Kinkos this week..they take the best pictures for me..with God and motivation..I can do anything I want

Negativity

This post is mostly to vent and get rid of any negativity in my life and move on from some mistakes I have made. I also am including it here so I can go back to remember how to deal because I am sure it will happen again.

So this week was the week of drama. Drama I hate, and drama I run from. It found me and caught hold and wouldn't let go this week, but I am casting it out for good NOW!!

This week started by watching a couple little girls for a friend having a baby. I also watched a couple kids for my dear friend Annette while she had a Dr. appt. I also had the regular daycare open for the other girls I watched but added wednesday, and 11 hours on friday to my mix with them.

In the Army there is support (supposed to be) groups that exist and unfortunatly when you get a group of women together who are not all positive the situation goes south and everybody just wants to move on.

My name is very popular overseas by some untruthful, in my opinion low self esteem , hurtful women who think because they have been in this life longer than me they can treat me like crap.

This is my blog and if you are reading it and get hurt feelings you know that it was you talking bad about me and may want to apologize and ask God for forgiveness. I can be honest here because it is MY BLOG!

I quit going to my FRG meetings as of now because in my opinion the leadership was horrible and it wasn't filling my need for the Army. I want more and to be more and the organization wants a bunch of people not willing to work and not have fun and that is not me.

I guess you can't just quit going without people saying you are destroying the organization..single handedly. I am apparently a clique starter and leave people out..I can go on and on. Well, there are a couple people that are coming out to be untruthful people and I am so glad this is happening in month 4 rather than 15 to see the real side of people so I don't waste my time.

I am no longer a daycare!!! YAY..because of this I have been relieved of my helping everyone out stress and even at this point could care less about people not appreciating me for saving them for the last three months. I am going to have such a great day tomorrow because I no longer have a little girl that I had to have so many talks on manners and lying, and waste my time on parenting more than my own four.

I have changed so much in the last year and am so glad that I handled my side of this situation with dignity and as an adult. I am now rid of any negativity from this organization and am now excited to go meet new friends that can be genuine in nature.

Do I have to remind everyone the greatness of God? He has softened my heart to know that this is not directed at me, but at issues these other ladies have in their own lives and although I really feel it is my calling to help motivate and change lives, I cannot force someone to be happy.

I love my life and am greatful for my church and the teachings of it and the God that heads it to show me true love and forgiveness. I am so thankful for the opportunities that I have to deal with situations and help others.

Side note: This blog is not about Annette, Bambi, or Sarah..those are the friends I have met here that I know I can trust, so I didn't want you thinking bad of them in any way.

Today

I have to post this morning because today is busy busy!!

As I sit here it is 8:00 am..

I went to the gym this morning at 5:30. I ran 2 miles without stopping but in 21 minutes.. what the crap! I need to workout a couple times a day to reach my goal of 2 miles in 18 minutes by the 30th. I will do it, I will, I will!

I got home and Cy and Court were up and ready for school. We pulled out the scriptures and read a couple chapter. Then we had some extra time so we read a section in Preach My Gospel. The Tennyson family is committed to sharing the gospel this year and preparing some families to meet the missionaries.

I played soccer with the kids while we waited for the bus and cleaned out my car. I still have to vacuum it out, but the trash can no longer fall out when I open the doors (seriously I said no more food in the car)

I am headed to the shower and will be ready and have the house picked up by 9. I still have some personal scripture study to do so that will be until 9:30. I have a couple kids coming to "daycare" at 9:30 and then off to playgroup and run errands.

Plan to be back by 12 to have lunch and take naps..me laying out in 80 degree weather while the kids sleep..can it get any better than this?

At 2 I will try to do some homework and play with the kids. I also need to clean the backyard, but will wait for the kids to help (since they did make the mess)

At 4 I am meeting a friend at the gym for a spinning class to burn some extra calories. I have hit a plateau and so I am kicking it up a notch.

I will run home to get showered and ready and have dinner as a family..Pasta of some sort I am sure. Then I am headed to my Mary Kay meeting to get some inspiration and training. I have decided not to go to the church training and hope that I am making a good decision.

After my meeting I have to finish a paper and finish pricing everything for the yard sale on saturday. I will not have time to post pictures today but tomorrow I have a bunch that will be up.

Have I mentioned how much easier it is to have kids when they are all walking with no bottles or formula. My life has changed in little over 2 weeks but is awesome non the less. I am having a blast with these kids and hope to blog about that soon..when I get time.

Have an awesome day everybody and know that God loves you and wants you to be happy and successful in everything you do!

Information wise

I just thought I would let everyone know of my new blog. Some may be interested and others not, so I am doing it seperate from this one.

roadtonational.blogspot.com

It is strickly to follow my Mary Kay and my dreams that go along with it.

Thanks to everyone for their continued support.

How to choose?

In life we are given lots and lots of choices from easy to hard. The range is endless really and sometimes the choices are obvious and sometimes they are list makers. I know that I usually have a goal that I way my choices against and it is pretty easy for me. As I fill my schedule with wholesome activities I am confused on how to choose?

My goals that I weigh my decisions against are: Getting my family closer to God, Preparing someone to be taught the Gospel, and my Mary Kay goals. Seldom do these things clash becuase they all pretty much can go hand in hand, but this Thursday I have a choice to make.

Note: Usually I woudn't be able to do any but I have a babysitter so need to choose the right choice.

Missionary training, Primary training, or Mary Kay success meeting. All of these things are very important to me and I realize I cannot make it to all at the same time..

I will be honest, when I pray I feel like the Mary Kay meeting, but you know how you second guess yourself? Well, I do anyway. I just hope I make the right decision. Literally it could propel me forward or hold me back..I just need to make a decision already!!

Another side note: I am thankful for God and the opportunity of personal revelation.

I miss my DADDY

I have to let you all know that we are starting to really feel Toby being gone. I knew it would take awhile since he has been gone for 10 weeks in the past. It will be 14 weeks this Tuesday. We are still keeping really busy but the fun of Toby has left the building.

He is going to make the kids a dvd I think here soon and we are doing the same for him, but Carmen is having a hard time. It really is hard to explain why Daddy has to work for so long, or why his airplane won't come home. I have to be very careful with the radio because any sad song makes here yell "I miss my DADDY". I in turn get to explain this situation she is in and try to let her remeber how much daddy loves her and that his boss will be letting him come home soon. What awesome kids I have to allow their dad to go fight for our country. What awesome kids I have that only complain every once in 14 weeks. As I figure it, we will only have about 4 or 5 bads so that is a promising thought.

On the flipside though..we are so proud of Toby and our own sacrifice here in Texas. I still think this is a really good opportunity for our family and feel like someday Carmen will understand like the older ones on why this is necessary and what her dad stands for and what we stand for as a family. GOD BLESS AMERICA!!

We have 17 Sundays left until we get to see Daddy again and are definitly on countdown...

Being Sick

I am not going to post anymore blogs like this one..I promise. I am sick again, and it is getting really annoying. I looked at the calender and it has been 8 months since I started feeling this way. It has not bothered me so much in the past week or so, but now I have had to cancel plans because of feeling like crap.

Today was the last straw..I had to cancel the gym with a friend because I thought I was going to pass out. The kids just see me doing what I do and think I am ok, but this morning?

I am taking the time to complain, because I don't do it much and hope it makes me feel better. I HATE being sick and am more mad at the couple of people that have asked me if I am bulimic or depressed because my husband is gone. It has been 8 months I have thrown up a couple times a week and had dizzy spells and almost faint a couple times a week also. I have weird side effects and am trying not to go crazy. Could it be stress? I guess so, but I think I handle stress pretty good and don't know why my hair would go all coarse if I was stressed out. The body does weird stuff however and maybe it could be. I wish I just knew.!!!

Ok, so that is the last of it..I am going to round someone up to give me a Priesthood blessing and go from there. I know God can help me figure it out, since doctors are STUPID!

No more complaining from me, I promise..but incase I die, I love you all! (ok it isn't that bad, but I do hate being sick)